The Old Masters – re-interpreted 88

Hail gentle visitor, well met and all that. I see you’re new around these parts; which is splendid because, between you and me, I don’t get nearly enough activity around my …..[that’s quite enough of that – Mrs Chips]. But seriously, if you landed here for the first time, allow me to apologise. I honestly don’t know what you might have have done to deserve it. One of the great unfairnesses of life, eh what? However, seeing as you’re here, you might as well pull up a palette and help me bludgeon the reputation of an Old Master.

Today’s heartless, artless assault will land squarely on the tender parts of one John Everett Millais. Born in 1829, this child prodigy became the youngest person to have been granted entrance to the Royal Academy of Schools. He later founded the Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood, and quite a few bits of his life sound just as soapy as the EastEnders – except with talent.

Look Isabella. Lorenzo apologised for kicking your wretched hound when she bit him. The very least you can do is offer to replace his pantyhose.

Look Isabella. Lorenzo apologised for kicking your wretched hound when she bit him. The very least you can do is offer to replace his pantyhose.

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About Freud Fission Chips

Despite the banality of the name, FFC has led an intensely varied life. Grateful for surviving almost three years as a 'troepie' (soldier for non-South African Readers) in the Angolan war, he determined to wring as much out of life as possible. Currently providing Business Analysis services, trading on the stock market and developing web pages to pay the bills, FFC also dabbles in wildlife, landscape and people photography, writing, and far too many interests for his own good. He has also travelled extensively in southern Africa (working on the sound theory that a moving target is more dificult to hit). These peregrinations also include over 1500kms on foot through some of the worlds most spectacular scenery. It hasn't all been plain sailing, beer and skittles, and endless beds of roses... Chief amongst the prerequisites for surviving Africa, with its mind-bending characteristics, is an appropriate sense of humour.... So, for now, he will be recounting the amusing among the annoying, the frustrating wrapped in the funny and extracting the mirth from the melancholy... Oh yes, there might be some alliteration too.
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