The Old Masters – re-interpreted 25

Wednseday. The cube farm is getting to you. Network is slow, Coffee machine broke at 08:30 this morning, the brainless idiot in the next cubicle is on the phone, arguing with her husband – loudly – about deomestic inconsequentialities. Your boss has just asked why the weekly report is not yet ready. You remind him it is Wednesday, not Friday and he looks at you as if you’ve taken leave of your senses. Lunch was the culinary equivalent of gunpowder and you’re feeling bloated and uncomfortable – frustration rising every nano-second. If the maintenance guys don’t stop their incessant hammer-drilling in the next minute you’re going to blow something and there will be casualties…….

Okay, take a deep breath. Count to ten and think of your favourite happy place….No, not some deserted Zanzibar beach – I mean your favourite website where all is calm, peaceful and safe – where you can turn your frustrations into shredding the reputation of an Old Master.

This week we gang up on none other than Rembrandt van Rijn.  In this image we see him as a shepherd in 1636.

Yes I do requests... No I do NOT do Justin Bieber covers - I do LEGITIMATE musical requests.

Yes I do requests… No I do NOT do Justin Bieber covers – I do LEGITIMATE musical requests.

There now – doesn’t that feel better? To the world this was just a painting (ok, quite a good painting), but to us it is a depression lifter, mood enhancer and has been known to cure athletes foot….and best of all, it’s not habit forming and has no known side effects.

For chronic anti-work symptoms, this page is also available in Schedule 8 format – containing 2.5kg of Xanax per post and even worse jokes – but only on recommendation of your foreign health practitioner.


About Freud Fission Chips

Despite the banality of the name, FFC has led an intensely varied life. Grateful for surviving almost three years as a 'troepie' (soldier for non-South African Readers) in the Angolan war, he determined to wring as much out of life as possible. Currently providing Business Analysis services, trading on the stock market and developing web pages to pay the bills, FFC also dabbles in wildlife, landscape and people photography, writing, and far too many interests for his own good. He has also travelled extensively in southern Africa (working on the sound theory that a moving target is more dificult to hit). These peregrinations also include over 1500kms on foot through some of the worlds most spectacular scenery. It hasn't all been plain sailing, beer and skittles, and endless beds of roses... Chief amongst the prerequisites for surviving Africa, with its mind-bending characteristics, is an appropriate sense of humour.... So, for now, he will be recounting the amusing among the annoying, the frustrating wrapped in the funny and extracting the mirth from the melancholy... Oh yes, there might be some alliteration too.
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